Well, my doctor called today to let me know the results from the chromosome tests done on the baby were back. They were normal. And this is how he said it, “the tests show a normal x chromosome female fetus.”
That really took me by surprise. I had no idea that information was going to be found out/told to us. Now, I guess if I had really thought through what a chromosome test meant, I might have figured this info would be made known – but it never crossed my mind. I heard him say “female fetus” and I don’t think I heard anything he said after that. At least not right away…they came back to me later, and they weren’t that important anyway.
In one way, it’s nice to know. On the other hand, it’s been almost a month – and now it’s like this new information makes it, the loss, all new again…and yet, in a different way.
This might sound bad or might not make sense…but, I knew the baby was a baby and would obviously either have been a boy or girl and I heard the heartbeat so of course I knew the baby was living and stuff…but hearing the sex of the baby, almost makes it more real. More real of a baby, person. A life to imagine once she would have been born.
I am thankful for this though because I told Evan right from the start it was a girl, so it’s kind of nice to know that the baby was in fact, a girl. I guess, in the end…it just gives me some more closure.
